the heart of december

Note: This month, I am participating in a blog project called Reverb 13. Each day during December, subscribers are emailed a writing prompt.

Today's prompt: What does your heart tell you?

My heart, late autumn:

I confess that I sometimes question,
That I always crave, and often pine;
That I keep looking for that photograph, never taken, of a woman who once was,
or will be, me.
And wonder if, and whether, and if ever.

I get vertigo on the most ordinary peaks
And am sometimes haunted by the Borealis,
Dancing unabashedly in the darkness,
Hinting at a cosmic magic
That exists beyond my grasp.

And sometimes, in a quiet moment,
I feel, with sudden apprehension,
That the story I'm writing has no theme
And is reaching a conclusion
That is out of my hands.

But I think I will love you in spite of
and just the same.